Medical Mysteries

After 2 1/2 weeks of pain in my shoulder, I am still trying to figure out what is wrong with it. It hurts, but why? Today I had an MRI. Not a pleasant experience, but I was tough and shed no tears. Nothing like being frozen in one position for almost an hour, and the position they have you in is one that causes tremendous pain to the injured site. Hello! That's like someone walking up and seeing a bruise on your arm then poking it and saying, "Does that hurt?"!!! I tell the Dr. it hurts to turn or lift my arm. What is the first thing they do? Turn it and lift it up way high so they can see the painful expressions on my face. I'm sure that's exactly why they do it. So, I will have my results read on Wednesday. To top off the pain, the doctors won't be at my beckon call on my time schedule so I can ge the answers I want...NOW!
Last night, I was telling mom that after all this pain and frustration, they'll tell me nothing is wrong with my shoulder at all. I am known for my mystery illnesses and injuries. If I'm going to have something happen, it has to have unknown symptoms and end up being nothing at all wrong with me. Mom and I took a moment to laugh at my best medical mystery of all time. YIPES STRIPES!!! Tarisa might already be laughing with this one.
There is humor, information, and caution in this story so please take notes. One evening, after a day outside, the family noticed I had some marks on my face. They didn't burn, tingle, or itch, as a rash possibly would. They were just there. The next morning they were just as red as the night before. Mom decided to call the doctor. We went and he looked me over just to give a baffled expression and no diagnosis. Two more doctors with the same outcome. By the time we saw the third doctor the lines had faded a bit and turned more brown than red. He had no idea what should be done or what even caused the marks. I was stuck with multiple stripes down my face. As we left the third doctor's office and headed toward home (after mom had spent the past couple of days off work and worried sick about the skin disorder her daughter seemed to have) the clouds broke and the ray of sunlight shone on me. Mom could not believe we had just spent all this time trying to figure out my ailment just to find out the true diagnoses. I have this wonderful cousin, we'll call her Jennifer. I wanted to be just like her. She had all the friends, a gorgeous body, a tan, and most important, beautiful blonde hair. "How do I get my hair blonde like that?" "LEMON JUICE!" That's right. Lemon juice is supposed to make your hair lighter...And apparently your skin darker. When I had put the lemon juice in my hair, it had dripped down on my face . I burned on the spots where the lemon juice had striped it's way down my face. By the third doctor it had faded to a nice striped tan. Lesson learned. If you are going to listen to your cousin, or anyone else you mold your teenage years after, make sure there will be no side effects. If you use lemon juice in your hair, keep a towel handy to wipe off the drips, or just use the lemon juice all over your body so that you can achieve a nice even tan without stripes. (Please avoid eyes as it will burn) No I have not tried the whole body lemon treatment, but I figure if it's going to get on the skin you might as well cover the whole thing.
So, I am thinking back on all this, wondering if this is yet another medical mystery for me where the outcome is nothing or something so stupid, like I'm sleeping on it wrong or something. That would just be my luck. Not that I want to be out of work for a long time, I just want answers as to why my shoulder hurts so bad!!